Between the crypto floating around at Burger's Lake and the Arlington public pools closing, it makes swimming in shark-infested waters seem downright delightful.
All of which is a very roundabout way to say I'm looking forward to Shark Week, beginning July 27 on the Discovery Channel.
About a year ago, Fort Worth drummer and tap-dancer John Angeles got his shot on America's Got Talent. But he was shot down by David Hasselhoff and the rest of the has-been/recovering-addict judges.
Why? Because during John's very difficult and highly creative routine, he dropped a drumstick. ... And I'm not talking turkey drumstick, folks.
But Angeles, who was working at Best Buy to get by, wasn't discouraged. And I'm happy to report that, despite the best efforts of an overrated TV show, he's gotten his big break. Angeles can be seen performing in the touring company of Stomp, the high-engery dance and percussion musical that opens tonight at Fair Park and runs through Sunday.
Check out John's talent in this video I shot last year. And know he's more talented than David Hasselhoff ever has a prayer of being.
Cheers, Mr. Angeles. You done good!
David Spade really is one of our most underappreciated sniveling little actors on the planet. ...
Come to think of it, he reminds me of the waifish scientist guy who landed on Lost -- just one of the many annoying "mysterious" characters who have parachuted onto the Grand Central Station of deserted islands this season.
While I'll admit my esteemed colleague makes some compelling arguments in favor of Lost, and, unlike me, has actual information to back up her opinions, she's clearly spent too much time in the hatch.
I mean, if I have to endure another "emotional chess match" between Locke and Ben, I will shoot them both and toss them in a mass grave. And how many times are the islanders going to get fooled by Juliette? And then forgive her!?!
And did Kate have Sawyer's baby in the flash-forward and just name it Aaron? Or is she really raising Claire's baby? Maybe the dingo ate her baby?
No matter, Claire's probably gonna eat it tonight.
Now, I'll admit that Lost has thrown some intriguing possibilities into the sea this season, but it's like a drunken octopus who's been blinded by a jellyfish -- all of it's tentacles flailing around in so many directions that its bound to sink and die a slow, painful death.
OK, even I confess that made no sense. Top that, Heather!
I was just having a conversation with a friend about Lost, which is one of the few shows I make a point to watch every week. She thinks it's great this season; I think it's about as exciting as Jack's facial hair.
From what I can tell, I'm the only who feels this way. It's gotten hosannas all around, but all I can say is I'm glad that tonight is the final show for awhile. We're promised another key character will bite the dust.
Promises, promises.
Henry Winkler, aka The Fonz, was in Dallas recently and I missed a chance to bowl with him, but here he is, along with the cast of Happy Days, talking about the good ol' days with Matt Lauer.
And there's a Happy Days musical coming!!
Arlington Marine mom Bonnie Blanco, 25, had a shot at glory in Sunday night's premiere of American Gladiator redux, but came up just short against a 31-year-old life-wellness trainer, Shanay Norvell, who looks destined to be on next year's Gladiator team.
It was down to the final challenge, the eliminator, a brutal obstacle course "with fire and water" that reduces the fittest specimens to jelly. Blanco bloodied her head on a steel bar after diving into the fire water just after the challenge began. She fell behind Norvell and never recovered. But she persevered and closed the gap at the finish, demonstrating grit and determination.
Homeys can be proud. Bedford resident Adam Levin and Carrollton's Toni Oppliger are next up. The resurrected Gladiator moves to 7 p.m. Mondays on KXAS/Channel 5 after Sunday's two-hour premiere.
As American Gladiators gets set to relaunch with a new edition on NBC Sunday night, all I can recall of the original was that platinum blonde bombshell with arms the size of your thighs, Zap.
With a Barbie doll head on top of an Incredible Hulk body, she was so freakish you couldn't turn away. Her real name is Raye Hollitt, and plenty of folks are knockin' on the former bodybuilder's door these days. Here's a Q&A with her.
And, for only $24.95, you can buy a compilation tape of her many TV and movie appearances, the most memorable of which is Skin Deep, a Blake Edwards
romp.
In that, she man-handles John Ritter's, um, manhood, like Chrissy and Janet never would. Good times.
A quick survey of the new cast didn't turn up anyone who could hold a candle to Zap, but Stealth (right) might make things worth watching.
And so will hosts Hulk Hogan and Laila Ali. Maybe they'll even incorporate some of Ali's dance moves from DWTS.
-- Kingpin
So TV Land and Entertainment Weekly have decided my 50 Greatest TV Icons for me, huh?
Where are Howard Cosell, Chris Berman and, most importantly, Ted Turner?
-- Lefty
The Albino Bowler points out a trend in our blogging this morning: Tony Romo's ESPN ad. Geico gecko ad. Nothing slips by AB.
So here's the challenge. Give us your favorites in two categories: Favorite sports commercials. (Thanks, Mean Joe!) And favorite advertising icons. (Yo quiero, Taco Bell).
Now that you've gotten our subtle hints, let's compile a Top 10 list of each and let the frivolous discussion begin.
I've been on hiatus for awhile, but just like Dancing with the Stars -- we're back, baby.
And this season, which starts tonight at 7, stars the one and only Dallas Mavericks owner Mark Cuban. And, personally, I can't wait. Cuban's a hoot. A regular guy with a big, fat wallet.
And I wouldn't be surprised if he can dance -- though he tells a certain competitor newspaper that he's gonna bust out into a white man's overbite at the first opportunity. We'll see.
On his blog, Cuban answers the question of why a billionaire would suit up in "Ricky Ricardo" outfits and dance on national television. I never would've asked. Why not? I'm just hoping that Dirk turns up in the studio audience and starts yelling at the judges. Here's Cube talking to TMZ cameras about his chances. He trash talks Dirk and Stackhouse and their ability to dance. (Also of note: Cuban recently had hip replacement surgery, which could hurt his chances. But he did teach disco at sorority houses while in college. Who knew?)
In other DWTS news ... hostess and super hottie Samantha Harris had her baby yesterday, which means she probably won't be on for much of the season. I, for one, am very sad. But congrats on the baby girl.
